“When he had received the drink, Jesus said, “It is finished.” With that, he bowed his head and gave up his spirit.” John 28: 30

      Scripture teaches us that Jesus was crucified, Webster’s define crucified as being ‘put to death by nailing or binding the hands and feet to a cross or to treat with gross injustice; persecute; torment; torture’. I think of this often, the severe suffering Jesus went through on that cross. The nails that were actually pounded in his hands, have you ever by accident stepped on a nail? A makeshift of a thorny crown shoved onto his head, the thorns piercing his skin with no relief. Have you ever pick a rose only for a thorn to prick your skin?

      As a mother, I do not think I could love anyone more than I love my girls and then my grandchildren came along and then my love seemed to expand much more. Sure I love my husband but my girls and grandchildren have a place in my heart like no other. I have no doubt in my heart if either of them would be suffering I could very easily take their place even to death, or could I? Then I think what God felt when he sent his son Jesus to make the ultimate sacrifice for not only those that were living when Jesus walked upon this earth but for the future generations after him. Oh, how Jesus suffered.

      He loved us even more than the love I have for my children and that is beyond any understanding I have at this moment. I used to live life feeling sad and lonely. At times when I felt happiness, I felt guilty. I somehow along the way felt I should not be happy. I concentrated on the negative, never once thought of being positive. I convinced myself I should not be happy.

      Then I guess I matured or God helped me change my way of thinking. I realized my negative thoughts was not what God intended for me when he allowed his son to die on that old rugged cross so long ago. Jesus could have very easily chosen to come off that cross but he loved us far more than anyone could ever imagine. Overtime, my thoughts began to change as I prayed to grow closer to him. My heart began to soften as I prayed for his love to reach the coldness I had felt for years.

      Of all the suffering Jesus went through on that cross because he chose to not come down was because he loved us. The nails in his hands, the thorns around his head, and the weight of his body growing heavier as it weakened. He deserves so much more from me than the guilt I felt I needed to feel all those years. Jesus deserves so much more from me now. Was his suffering not worth it?

      Today, I choose to have joy in my heart, I choose to be positive and I choose to not let the negatives of this world defeat me for the sake of what Jesus did for me. Otherwise; the life I used to live was a mockery to the love he shown me in his suffering, would not all the suffering he went through be useless if I didn’t choose to live my life differently? He deserves more, don’t you think?